Monday, November 30, 2009

Caught In A F$@&'king Jam On Way Back From Penang!

F*UCK ! F*UCK! F*UCK! That's all i have to say about my journey back from Penang yesterday evening. Over the long weekend, my straight friends paid a surprising visit to my peaceful, quiet town ( which actually came alive during the Hari Raya hols - My town will only get a major Traffic Jam only TWICE / year -- One is during Hari Raya and the other is Chinese New Year or when there is any long weekends just like last week ).

After that, we decided to have some fun over in Penang lor ( hahaha...i shall elaborate further on what i did in Penang in my future posts ya! ). That was in Saturday. Fast forward to Sunday,after having a late Thai-seafood tea-break over in Butterworth, we began our journey back at 5 pm - south-bound.

Everything went smoothly until we came to the Juru Toll -- which eventually, was HELL all the way!!! Who would have imagined or even thought of, JAMMED from Juru all the way to a place 130km away!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not bluffing!!! The ride was bumper-to-bumper all the way from Juru, Penang until the Sungai Perak Rest Stop ( ~ 110km = which is just before going uphill to the tunnel! ) - From the usual 1 hour 30 mins trip, it turned into a 6 hour drive!!! ( 5 pm to 11 pm! )

There were horrible jams in the exit to Bukit Mertajam, Taiping & Kuala Kangsar ( who would have thought the jam exiting to Taiping was the worst! - I never knew that there were so "MANY" people going into Taiping pulak. -- And also, the jam leading into the Rest Stop. It was already dinner time, everyone was hungry and need to go to the toilet, it so happens to be Prayer's time for the Muslims too - So, we even had to skip a few rest stops and continue to "YAN! YAN! YAN! ( hold our toilet urge! ) cz the jam was unbearable.

I've always been a courteous driver ( and still is ) - but that day, i have no other choice but to resort to the dirty tactics of cutting queue by driving in the Emergency lane..( Hehehehe ...wei, evryone was also doin' the same ma -- But i only did that for 2km nia! --  2km out of 130km -- I should not deserve to be cursed right?! Hahaha ....).

We had to stop at the last Rest Stop before reaching our journey because we had "tahan'ed" since 5pm ady...Over there, the queue to the toilet was a total madness! Half of the Male Toilet @ the Petrol Station had to be opened for The Ladies ( which also further justifies the fact that there are more women than men in Malaysia ) while the guys was restricted to the urinals only, except, if they have a "big business" to deal with.
( p/s: The Horny BF was open enough to use the urinal with the unknown ladies queueing behind him -- while The SHY Simon Lover opted to walk further away to the Rest Stop's toilet instead -- Very shy showing off my KKJ leh!!! )

Sigh...All in all, this is actually my first time caught in a traffic jam in a HIGHWAY throughout my 20+ existence in Malaysia. Most of the time, my journey back to my hometown is always in the opposite direction and the ride is always a breeze compared to those of the opposite lane.

  I WANT MY MONEY BACK, 
U F%&KING PLUS HIGHWAY!

We finally reach our destination about 11 + pm...Me had to sleepover in my "friend's" house, gone to bed at 1.00am but had to wake at 5.00am this morning to follow my colleague's car back to my peaceful "work-town". So, basically i'm A CUTE WALKING ZOMBIE at the moment of writing this post lor! ...Ciao from Simon!

3 comments:

nicky05 said...

cool down simonlover!!!!! hehehe....XD

William said...

Cute zombies don't exist! Cute vampires got la.

simonlover said...

Nicky: Back then reli cnt cool dwn ler..

William: U wanna be my vampire isit? Suck Suck?! Noti noti..

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