Monday, March 1, 2010

Horny BF Rants : 23 Things About Simonlover - Part 2

Are You Salivating Yet? ;)

Yup, it's me again. Ze HORNY One, in case you've forgotten. And no, I'm not buried six feet under, nor abducted by aliens, nor even 'jumped ze ship' and found myself another twinkish delight to play with. 
Though I can't hide the fact that that sounded mighty stimulating. Hehe ... ANYWAY, since Simon started his ball(s) rolling with the first half (13 out of 23 ain't bad, but of course, refer to reason #13 for the explanation on why the Horny BF took over with this post) .... let me have my moment and rant all I want, in this magnificent edition of (drumrolls plz ....)

- 23 Things About Myself - Part 2 -

Okay, okay, maybe NOT so much about MYSELF, for this IS Simon's blog after all. I'll see how much I can come up with, then pepper the rest with JUICY details or something along the line ... okay?

 

14. Simon is actually a Wild Animal. Whoops, I meant to say, he has those wild instincts. Wait, that sounded somewhat raunchy either. Okay, so he can be rather petite (as mentioned by himself), and somewhat reserved when you first meet him, but after a while, you'll realize that he's another one of those beastly beings (I won't mention the exact place where this transformation takes place, but have a wild guess .... =P) at times. And of course, he won't bite. Okay, maybe in certain circumstances



15. Simon may be petite (imagine cradling a 55kg twink in one hand AND reaching your own d*ck with the same hand!) but damn can he EATS !!! Yeah, if you've got leftovers (not cum, please), especially desserts of the cloyingly, sickeningly sweet kind, throw them at him. He'll come begging on all fours. For the SWEETS, not you. ;)


 16. Simon has a rather fiery temper. Yup, may NOT sound like it, but he sure is packed with some firepower. But of course, Horny BF himself is a firecracker himself, hence the constant explosion of cum fireworks when we cross dicks swords. Yeah, on such a constant basis, we bicker almost on every single topic on earth. Personal life, work life, love life, politics, economics, weather (!) and the list goes on. But of course, as they say, it's an almost habitual ritual for old couples to argue over trivial matters ... to strengthen the relationship. Or so they say. But am I glad we have yet to resort to any forms of violence. 





 17. Simon has a deep fascination with gay porns. Wait, make that both of us. Seriously, which PLU does not, huh? Don't tell me you learn from your elders, or read from books/magazines, or 'accidentally bumped into those materials' coz I damn sure won't believe a word you say. Since we're both creatures of raging testosterones, and seeker of the most UNholy contents on the Net, between the both of us, we probably own a quarter of the Net's most saliva-inducing X-rated contents. Hahaha, okay, so I exaggerated . Slightly. But from where do YOU think those tantalizing shots of guys in all compromising positions Simon has been posting on a daily basis came from?  

18. Simon likes to swim. Ahem, I beg to differ. Simon likes to SEE people swim. Hahaha .. (I'm so dead. Maybe this post would be churned into the black hole as soon as he sees this! Anyone remember the Horny BF's Last of Me post? Hehehe ... I'm pushing the boundaries here) Ask him out for a movie (must be a GOOD one okay? Refer reason #11 if you're lost), he might reject you coldly. Ask him out for a meal, he might think twice, or thrice (depends on the place lah .... no wishy-washy Western fares for the picky Simon). But suggest for a swim at any of those public or private pools equipped with the most indecently-exposed shower cubicles (or lack thereof) and you'll see him drooling and changing into his tight Arena's, Aqux or what-nots in a flash. Even Horny BF also kalah when it comes to this ....


 19.  We're both coffee-addicts, really. Nope, and this has nothing to do with the fact that we're constantly staying up late for extra co-curricular activities or anything of that nature. (We do not need the extra kick, really ... hehe) Give us the options of coffee or tea (or me?) and guaranteed it'll be coffee 70% of the time. No compromise, no second guessing. Be it Starbucks, Old Town, or even the thickest, darkest (don't get funny ideas ...) kopi kaw in rustic kopitiams.

If there's a choice between coffee or alcohol, we'll pick coffee hands down. Unless of course, it's clubbing sessions, then ordering coffee might get those bouncers on yer a$$ pretty quick .......

20. Simon is actually a darn good navigator. Yup, no need for GPS, maps nor asking for directions. He's a natural born tracking device. Of course, in every sense of the word. If you get my drift ..... ;)

Surprisingly, I'm the one who repeatedly got lost, and brought back to the intended route on most occasions. Be it on the road, in the darkest maze of those sleazy saunas (hehe, any takers?), or metaphorically speaking, in life itself. :)

P/S : Thanks, dear. You know what I mean .....
21. Simon does NOT like to sing at karaokes. LOL. But on the contrary, though Horny BF's a croaking toad with thundering, ear-blistering hoarse voice, he loves to sing at any possible moment. Yup, and moaning/groaning in bed doesn't count. I still wish we can go and sing our lungs/livers/spleens out someday .... really. After all, I was not having the BEST of the festive season this past two weeks. Hmmm .... who wanna join? Hehehe, better bring your own mic then. ;)


22. This blog was never intended to be a personal blog. Or so Simon said. Somewhat bordering on a blog that's NOT safe for office, Welcome To The World Of Simonlover was started way back in the golden era when Simon decided to chronicle/archive/share his enviable collection of sexy shots with the world. Then slowly it transformed into a personal blog, with rants and ramblings from Simon himself and the Horny BF alike. And no, Horny BF is NOT a fictitious character born from the insane mind of Simon's. Hehehe, I'm real. As real as can be. And yes, as mentioned by his lordship Simon in the first half of this saga, Horny BF is in fact, seeking for companions for a good movie or two. For Simon's too picky at times, while I go for any movies under the sun. Or on the reels.



23. Last but not least, we would really, REALLY like to thank all the loyal supporters, readers, and fans (or detractors alike ... don't worry, we don't hold grudges) of this blog.
If I could, I'll kiss each and every one of you, strip you off those uncomfortable shirts/pants/boxers/straps you're wearing and ... let the imagination run wild. :)

Okay, so I was really desperate to end this longer than usual post, for I've run out of ideas. Yeah, I'm not a writer like Simon, so don't compare.  

Have A Blast Everyone !!! (Am I to tag the next unlucky soul?)

14 comments:

William said...

It's so sweet that you completed this post for him. :)

Takashi said...

Simon.. I have quite a nice pool with jacuzzi at my condo.. and indeed for the indecent shower that's right under somebody's home, I'll rather shower at home!!

Ask William.. he does swim at my place sometimes :)


So..... hehe what's it gonna be? My place or what? ^_^

C'est la vie said...

haha, let's go swim then. I also don't really swim a lot. Most of the time was used to ogle. :P

the happy go lucky one said...

hmmm i was expecting more :P
anyway thats good ones, and im coffee addicts too and noooo... those extracocurrilar activities cant keep me awake, nor the coffee :P
im very bad in sense of direction too, always get lost!
thanks for the sharing :)

Anonymous said...

This confirms my suspicions that Simon is one of those guys who can eat and eat anything and not put on any weight at all - whereas I get bloated just looking at a slice of chocolate mudcake - I HATE him. - Ian

simonlover said...

William: I think we shud tag our BFs next!!!

Takashi: Oh. I dun dare shower openly in condo's pool as well. Imagine the whole condo looking @ u. What he meant was the showers in certain public pools. Hehe. U meant your bathroom or your swim pool leh?!

Cest La Vie: Haha. Sure.Me like ogle too.

Happy Go Lucky: A-Ha..ALready 3 things in common! Hehe.

Ian: Well, i wouldn't mind absorbing some of the fats. Certain parts need fats to make it look nicer. Hahaha

Lucas said...

I love good coffee too :)

if the both of u ever come to the land down under, I'll take you on a coffee experience you'll never forget.

Heart KL said...

very interesting... :)

meticulous said...

Did I see something mention to go for swimming? hahaha

meticulous said...

*someone* ... not something... pardon me..

Takashi said...

If you ever come down to my condo, I'll take you on a swim experience you'll never forget!


Wahahaha.. sounds salah!!!

nicky05 said...

im coffee addicts my self but im not good navigator.

one word to describe simonlover....FIERCE..XD

Sh@KiR@ CK said...

Me got an award for you!

come over to http://justmeshakirack.blogspot.com/2010/03/awesome-gifts-from-crackerjacks.html

hugs
shakira

Gratitude said...

Ooooo Simon must av been suffering so much since he only had a cup of coffee with us. Will tempt him with lotsa sweets next time. :P
+Ant+